


Like Gravity

by makos_lightningrod



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: F/M, Slight Makorra
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-22
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-03-02 18:34:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2822093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/makos_lightningrod/pseuds/makos_lightningrod
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You’ll be better in no time. You just need to heal.” That was what every person said to Korra. That she would be up and walking again sooner than later. That her fight with the Red Lotus had taken a toll on her body and that if it was anyone else, it would be the same. But she was the Avatar, they said. If anyone could find the strength to walk again, then it would be her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Like Gravity

“You’ll be better in no time. You just need to heal.” 

That was what every person said to Korra. That she would be up and walking again sooner than later. That her fight with the Red Lotus had taken a toll on her body and that if it was anyone else, it would be the same. But she was the Avatar, they said. If anyone could find the strength to walk again, then it would be her. It was inevitable.

Inevitable never seemed to come. But it wouldn’t as long as she refused to get up and try. Ever since then, she had stayed firmly sitting or laying down ever since she tried to move her legs the first time she woke up. Her legs were broken and she had come to terms with that.

Mako had tried to give her space to heal, to just be there when she needed him. He wasn’t like Bolin, able to make her laugh even when she didn’t look like she could anymore. He wasn’t like Asami who seemed to be able to offer support and kindness.

No, every time he opened his mouth he just made things worse. Like when he snapped at the tenth person to tell her she’d be better in no time, that she was strong. That had nothing to do with her refusal to even try. She was being stubborn, and sometimes he just wanted to make her get up, at the very least, to try and take a few steps. The worry that ate at his heart made him irrationally afraid that her mindset was hurting her more than the poison ever had.

Tenzin had been the one to suggest going to the Fire Nation for a little while to recuperate. Zuko had been more than welcoming to have her stay at the palace and she had to admit that it had been nice so far. Being there with Asami, Bolin, and Mako especially had given her some space to just exist instead of worrying about everything else in the world.

That was until Zuko had suggested she talk with the royal healers since they worked miracles. It had left a bitter taste in her mouth and she had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep from lashing out a refusal. She managed a no thank you before retreating to her bedchambers with Asami in tow.

Mako and Bolin were left behind, glancing at each other before retreating after the two girls and wondering if they were even welcome. As they neared the room, they could hear Asami attempting to talk reason to Korra.

"Are you sure you don’t want them to look at you?" Asami said softly.

Korra glanced over at her and shook her head. “I’ve had plenty of healers look at me and they’ve all said the same thing. That I just need to recuperate and start trying to walk again. And you and I both know there’s no reason for me to try,” she said faintly, exhaking as she wrapped her hands under he calves and pulled them both onto the bed. “I’ve already accepted that. And everyone else should, too.”

In the hall, Bolin frowned and threw his brother a look who returned it with the same kind of empathy.

“You haven’t even tried to walk,” Asami told her, sitting down on the bed beside hers and sighing. “If you start to…even standing up, that makes a big different, Korra.”

"I can’t," she retorted, a little anger in her voice. "I can’t stand up, and I can’t walk, and everyone needs to accept that. I have."

Her voice was full of bitterness, and she didn’t look at her friend. She was drowning in a pool of self-pity and nothing could save her from herself.

"But if you haven’t tried," Asami began before she sighed. "The longer you wait the harder it will be, the healers said that, too."

“Okay,” Asami said softly, looking at her for a moment. “Let’s just go to sleep then,” she smiled, touching her best friend’s knee before she slipped into her own bed. A moment later the room went dark. 

But Korra’s eyes remained open.

***

Lingering in the corridor, Bolin and Mako sighed before walking off together. “It’s been two months,” Bolin murmured. “She’ll walk again,” he said with determination in his voice. “Don’t you think?”

"No," Mako said without hesitation. "I don’t think she will. She won’t even try, and you know how stubborn Korra is."

He looked over at his brother, his face lined with worry as he ran a hand through his hair. “We have to get her to try walking again. If she takes at least one step, she’ll realize she’ll be able to do it if she just gets up her strength.”

***

In the morning, Korra waited until she heard the sound of the door open and shut as Asami went to breakfast. She turned onto her back and sighed, gazing up at the ceiling as the dull ache in her head pulsed. Since the fight with Zaheer, she had managed to get a few hours of sleep every night before she woke up with the awful sound of screaming coming out of her mouth and Asami clutching her hand until she pretended to fall asleep again.

She closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. She usually waited for Asami to come back before she got out of bed, but she looked at her wheelchair and exhaled slowly. Reaching over, she gripped the armrest.

And pushed it across the room.

She cursed to herself as the chair skittered off, now way out of her reach. She had thought to drag herself into it using her upper body strength, but now it was too far away to be much good.

Her jaw clenched, and she debated just laying there until Asami came back to help her into it, but she hated the fact that she had to be helped at all.

She looked at the chair and pressed her lips together before sitting up. She slowly gripped her legs and planted them on the side of her bed. She vaguely felt the cool surface of the floor before twisting her body up, her hands gripping the tangled sheets tightly. “Come on, Korra,” she whispered, feeling the weakness in her calves.

She steeled herself, her gaze locked onto the wheelchair across the room, just a few short steps, really, before she pushed her arms down against the matress. Her muscles bulged. She was using more of her upper body strength than the weak muscles in her calves to get herself upright.

But then she was standing, her knees wobbling with the effort to support her body and keep her straight. A flash of a grin crossed her mouth. She did it. She had stood up!

All of her concentration was on just staying upright. She held her arms out and remembered the way she trained when she first started to airbending. It was the same balance that she had tried to achieve prematurely, but she felt the solidness of the ground and bit her lip, trying not to get ahead of herself and start trying to jump around.

But just as quickly as she celebrated her victory, her body gave way.

Her legs crumbled beneath her, and she tried to lock them in place, to keep the pull of gravity from pulling her down to the ground, but it was useless. All she could do was curl her body, cushioning her fall so that she didn’t damage anything when she hit the ground with a thud.

She laid there, staring at the chair still a few feet away, not even realizing that it was blurring in her vision.

“You’re pathetic,” she whispered to herself, clenching her eyes shut as they burned. If she could see herself now from a year ago, she would have said the same thing. 

She didn’t want Asami to come in there and see her laying there in a fetal position and immediately propped herself up. Hastily wiping her face, she placed one palm in front of the other and dragged herself toward her wheelchair, panting softly when she finally reached one of the pedals.

Her fingers clutched on the metal, squeezing the cold rod on one side before she dragged her hand up to reach higher. She lifted with her arms, trying to pull up her whole body without attempting to put any weight on her useless legs.

Her arms wobbled with the effort, not use to so much action now that she wasn’t training hard. She fell back down to the floor with a groan. “Get up, you have to get up,” She mumbled. She steeled herself to try again.

Ten minutes passed by and she remained on the floor, her face slightly flushed from the exertion and a faint layer of sweat on her forehead. “Get up,” she hissed at herself. For a moment, she relaxed. And with a grunt, she grabbed onto the seat and slithered her way up into it before twisting so she could properly sit. 

A rush of emotion washed over her. It should have been pride and she should have been beaming. But instead, she looked down at her thighs and swallowed hard. “What good are you?” She whispered quietly as she buckled at the waist, her face pressing at where her knees met. “Why won’t you walk?” She slipped her hands against her face, pressing hard against her eyelids as she fought the urge to cry again.

***

From that morning on, every morning she waited for Asami to help her into her chair. Korra didn’t want a repeat of what happened the one time she tried to do it herself because certainly, the next time she tried she wouldn’t get up again. She’d be laying there on the floor. Pitiful.

Finally, the others had stopped pushing her to go to therapy, to try and walk again. They thought that, given time, she’d do it herself.

Asami and Bolin were reluctant to let the matter go, but the knew how much she had gone through. They had wanted to be there for her whenever she needed them to be. But Mako was getting impatient. He was exhausted of watching her from across the room as she played pai sho with Asami. She didn’t even like pai sho. The one time he had tried to play with her and she flipped the board in frustration, complaining that it was boring.

“This is pointless,” he murmured to Bolin as the two of them sat together outside in the pagoda, watching as Asami pushed Korra around the large pond. “She should go at least once.”

"Bro, she will," Bolin said as he looked at the two girls. "She just needs time. It’s like when I was teaching Pabu his tricks. He didn’t want to learn, but when he made up his mind to get the treat, he did what needed to be done."

It was a horrible metaphor, but Bolin was obviously trying to placid his impatient brother.

“That is not the same,” Mako replied with a roll of his eyes as he rubbed his temples. “I’m still unconvinced that she’s okay with this,” he frowned, sitting back and watching Asami and Korra. He noticed that she still had the dark lines under her eyes. He knew what insomnia looked like. In the years after his parents had died, he could never sleep. He was always haunted by the memory of their death. He had no doubt that she had nightmares all the time. 

The first peaceful night after Zaheer’s capture, the house had woken up to the blood-curdling screams coming from the girls’ room and he still remembered how tightly she clutched to Asami when they barged inside. 

“I’m tired of this,” he said with an air of finality. With a steady look at Korra once more, he sat back and began to think.

***

A few days later he convinced Asami to let him be the one that took Korra on her daily stroll around the turtleduck pond, and he was just quiet as he wheeled her outside.

Today was the day she was going to start walking, Mako wasn’t taking any arguments to the contray.

"Why don’t you sit on the edge of the fountain?" He suggested after a moment, stopping the wheelchair just a few inches away from where she could comfortably get herself out of it without using her feet.

A frown marred her otherwise beautiful face. She touched the edge of the fountain. “You have to push me a little closer, Mako,” she told him as if she thought it was silly that he couldn’t see that she wasn’t close enough for her to get to. “Or are you planning on picking me up and putting me on it?” There didn’t seem to be any amusement to her voice - just pure annoyance and frustration.

He was surprised that she even let that emotion out. But it didn’t deter him from the matter at hand.

"You just need to put your feet down and take a step to get to it," he said cooly, wanting her to know that he wasn’t going to give into her demands so easily. "It’s not even a step away."

He crossed his arms over his chest, gazing at her. He wasn’t about to let this go.

Her eyes widened slightly before her eyes turned to him. “If it isn’t a step away, then it shouldn’t be a problem for you to close the gap and let me reach it easily,” she snapped, retracting her hand and putting it in her lap. “That seems like the logical thing to do, don’t you think?” She waited for him to move.

He glared at her, taking a step back away from the chair so she understood he wasn’t going to move it. “Stop it, Korra. You need to stand up. You need to try because this is getting ridiculous.”

“I don’t need to try anything,” she told him with frustration. “In fact, I don’t need to sit on the fountain. I’m pretty comfortable sitting here.” She couldn’t believe that he was doing that - that he was trying to push her when it was clear that she had no intention of doing what he wanted. “Why are you being like this?”

He growled, low in his throat. His usually calm composure was gone now. He didn’t know what it was about Korra that always made his emotions come out.

"Because you’re just having this-this pity party for yourself!" He said angrily. "You’re not even trying to walk, instead you’d rather just sit there and-and mope!"

Korra stared at him, her jaw slackened from his outburst before it tightened. “In case you haven’t noticed, I have gone through a lot this year and I don’t think you have any right to be telling me what I should and shouldn’t do. I am not moping. I’m not having a pity party. I’ve just accepted that I won’t walk anymore. Why can’t you?”

"How can you just accept that?" Mako demanded as his fist clenched. "You haven’t even tried to walk! How can you give up without even trying? That-that isn’t the Korra I know." The Korra he loved.

“The Korra that you know is long gone,” she said with a stern calmness to her voice. “You should accept that by now. I have.” Saying it aloud like that caused pain to plume in her chest and she gripped her wheels. “This is ridiculous. I’m not going to argue with you about this, Mako. Don’t push it again. I’m not going to try walking and you telling me I need to is not going to make me do it any more than I don’t want to do.”

And she began to propel herself forward, wanting to get away from him.

He let her go, his shoulders falling from their tense position as she moved further and further away. He didn’t know what else to do.

But he was not going to let this drop.

Just before she disappeared from sight, he jogged and caught the handles of her wheelchair, firmly holding her in place.

“Hey-!” Korra felt the sudden jolt of stopping and turned to look at him. “Let go of me!” She demanded, trying to push at her wheels to get herself going, but it seemed as though he wasn’t going to let go. “Mako!”

"No, you’re going to get up and try to walk." He said firmly. "Show me you can’t then, and I won’t ever make you try. But if you don’t try at least once then I’m not going to let you move!"

“I CAN’T!” She finally shouted, grabbing his wrists the best that she could. “Don’t you think I know that I could try, Mako!?” Her nails dug into his skin. “I’ve tried. My legs don’t work anymore,” she told him as her body shook. She remembered the morning before - how she had gotten so excited that she stood, only to have her legs fail miserably beneath her. “Why can’t you understand that? Why can’t anyone understand that I am not going to walk again?! I’ve accepted it!”

"That’s just because you’re still recovering! All your muscles aren’t used to working anymore," he said, swallowing hard. "You have to work up to walking more!"

“I don’t want to try anymore!” Korra finally confessed. “I don’t want to do this anymore,” she breathed, feeling her chest tighten again. “This is it for me. This is how I’m going to be for the rest of my life.” She felt her eyes stinging and closed her eyes, trying to calm herself down. “What kind of Avatar could I ever be?”

"You’re a great Avatar," he said softly, a little scared to see her so broken down like that. "But you can’t-you have to try, Korra, and we’ll be here to help you." He wanted her to know that.

“I shouldn’t be though,” she said after a moment of silence as she reached up to wipe her face. He was the last person she wanted to see her like this. “The world doesn’t even need an Avatar anymore,” She twisted herself around and gave a hard pull on her wheel chair. “So just leave me alone.”

She didn’t dare take a breath until she was far enough to let her body be taken over by the tremors.


End file.
